inhale

Mereka kata ku gila
Lagilah aku suka
Otakku geliga
Fikiran luar biasa

Mereka kata ku samseng
Tapi ku tak ambil pusing
Pedulikan semua
Fikir apa yang penting

Jangan percaya kata mereka
Sudah ku kenal pasti
Kau pujaan hati
Cinta sejati memang boleh dibeli
Tapi tak mungkin ditukar ganti
Akan ku taati Maharani

Mereka kata ku tipu
Tapi ku tak meniru
Mereka semua pemburu
Pemburu yang cemburu

Semua tuduhan
Fitnah belaka
Ada yang suka
Juga ada yang benci
Biar peluru menembus kulitku
Suatu yang pasti kekal abadi
Akan ku taati Maharani

Mereka kata kau sama
Tiada apa yang berbeza
Aku tau kau tak serupa
Tak silau lihat harta

Repeat this

Solo

* Mmg aku gila

My dearest friend,

You have been a good one,

It has been nice knowing you,

One day we’ll meet again,

Insyaallah in the everlong kingdom of heaven..

Allahyarham Mohd Fitri has passed away on 18th of February 2008 due to a fatal road accident. Let us pray for his soul to be blessed by the Almighty. Al-Fatihah.

oh hiba, memang waktu ini kaulah temanku
(memang hidup, apa-apa pun ajal yang kau tempuh)

memang tuhan sayangkanmu
ku tatap gambar wajahmu

harus ku teruskan hidup
walaupun perit tanpamu
tetap ku peluk erat memori kau dan aku
harus ku teruskan hidup
walaupun perit tanpamu
ku doakan agar kau sentiasa bahagia di sana

Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am home again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am whole again

Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am young again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am fun again

However far away I will always love you
However long I stay I will always love you
Whatever words I say I will always love you
I will always love you

Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am free again
Whenever I’m alone with you
You make me feel like I am clean again

Chorus

I asked her to stay but she wouldn’t listen
She left before I had the chance to say
The words that would mend the things that were broken
But now it’s far too late, she’s gone away

[Bridge]
Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking: "Why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?"
Hard to believe that

[Chorus]
It’s not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won’t go home without you

The taste of your breath, I’ll never get over
The noises that you made kept me awake
The weight of things that remain unspoken
Built up so much it crushed us everyday

[Bridge] & [Chorus]

Of all the things I felt but never really shown
Perhaps the worst is that
I ever let you go
I should not ever let you go

[Chorus]

And I won’t go home without you..

* Hear it and probably no regret

it has been hard for me going thru these moments. this place is hell as people are talking tears and pains. i have nowhere to go, no way to fix and no chance to run. i just hate that bitch - you’re just the darkest cloud that i’ve never invited. i just hate what i’m doing now - why can’t it be one good apple out of those rotten i’m swallowin’ now? i just hate my carelessness - and for it i’m gonna fall..

this is a beginning
although this is an end
i got a sight of heaven
and it’s gone straight to my head
and the time is right for falling
this time i’m gonna fall
that’s the price i must pay
for a taste of your sweet love
i’m gonna fall
this time i’ll fall
gonna fall
something in your glances
puts a spell on me
as the world fades all around
you’re all that i can see
and the time is right for falling
this time i’m gonna fall
that’s the price i must pay
for a taste of your sweet love
i’m gonna fall
this time i’ll fall
gonna fall
feel it taking over
gonna reach there soon
the warmth of skies at sunset
i want to linger in this glow
and the time is right for falling
this time i’m gonna fall
that’s the price we both pay
for a taste of your sweet love
i’m gonna fall
this time i’ll fall
gonna fall

i’m sorry for what i’ve done. i just can’t forgive myself..

"..
words are flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup
they slither while they pass they slip away across the universe
.."
perfect - is the best way to describe phrases above. they were arranged beautifully, stealing my heart each time i hum the song. wish i can express feelings in such way.

i believe human’s lifeline is always dramatic. too little to find similarities with storyline in films. hero doesn’t always win. villain isn’t going to fall in a death hole at the end of the day. no background song to describe current situation. this ain’t exciting anymore eh? so what actually keeps people going? in my diary, i live as i have hope. hope for god’s greatness to reward me with heaven, hope to be a successful lover for my loved ones, hope to become a great achiever in career, hope this, hope that, never-ending hope.. a movie that has changed my life of retaining hope is the one on top of my list of all time; the shawshank redemption. if any of you guys had no idea of what it is, i advice you to go and see it. produced in early 90s, i still feel that it easily hands off any high-tech and well-known casts movie. not to say it’s close to real life, but it has included lessons that i took seriously up until today. i give it an 8 out of 5! dear friends, never give up hope in life. we can be crawling for our lives throughout years and suddenly during one fine day, gain back dignity and rise above all. doesn’t matter if we are expelled from college, being drug addicts for too long, lost virginity before getting married, jailed for crimes or for what so ever reason, there’s always hope for a better tomorrow. this isn’t any fairy tale, it happens to people everyday everywhere. just don’t give up. work towards any light that you can see though it looks so dim. there’s always hope.

frankly, at times i’ve given up hope - at those moments when i tried so hard to win, and ended up losing battles. luckily there are few who will always remind me to gain back hope and live. trust me as i am serious. to point out one, now i am facing that stage of losing. it makes me damn pissed off when i know that i’m on the right side but have to hide creating camouflage in the jungle. how can’t i scream out loud for justice? but even crying my heart out will not help. i wish that i can tell this story of idiots educated people. but for the sake of all, i’ll stop here.

movie review eh, syg? yes i’ve been addicted in going to cinemas. from lots of them let me try to rate one. hmm.. which one? as i don’t want to be rated as pro only to yasmin ahmad’s, let’s not talk about mukhsin. not long ago me and syg went to see a low-profile movie called chermin. the storyline is typical, but wait.. chermin’s line of casts is surprisingly not bad, not bad at all. hard to say but got to be fair on this, natasha hudson can act! for the love of god, zul please shut up and stop smiling as i know you are her top fan; "wei…. natasha hudson wei. weiiii…." okay you win bro. i’m impressed with her debut in country’s filming industry. btw, she’s not that so very beautiful if you say that she has a complete package ^_^ others, deanna yusoff and khatijah tan as usual looked matured while the rest that i noticed that were also impressive are soffi jikan and farah ahmad. go go malaysia! chermin is about a wife that suffered for his husband ignorance towards her as they are married cousins. she was never touched, trying hard to earn attention but failed and at the end is about to be divorced as her husband married a 2nd wife of his choice. from there tragedy happened and until today generations from that man’s 2nd wife is haunted by ghost of her. ignore the idea, consider its casts, sets and plots, chermin is not a total waste of money. for me, chermin is a 3 out of 5.

also appended in this post, i would like to congratulate my other half yusnida mohd razalan for getting in an international firm. i’m so proud of you syg. it seems that i’m determine to increase my current investment in you as dividend that i’ll enjoy looked to be irresistible ^_^ hmm.. people said that swiss starbucks tastes unique eh? won’t know until you bring me there and try, right? ^_^ okay, now for real. i feel like sharing the joy that is rewarded to you syg. syukur alhamdulillah. you deserve it, after all the hard work you’ve done. let us pray for more prosperous things to come in our life. and also for our love. love you so much.

stop giving me that face please. a carnivore has feelings, too ^_^

what else? football!!! of course. bianconeri is coming back! near to the end of serie b hopefully juventus can clinch up the title. hopefully by next season i can watch back the flat tone serie a highlights show. the most respectful member of the squad for me is gianluigi buffon. i salute you, gigi! even if after this you move to other clubs, spending this season with my soul club and being disrespected all year long entitled you to be club’s icon. there are others too, but mostly other are players getting old, loosing form or still not considered as international as him. it’s the world cup winner’s keeper i’m talking about here. generally, i’m waiting for juve’s comeback to serie a. woohoo! in premier league, red devils are looking good as ever going for treble. last weekend selangor beat perlis 1-0 - yessss! stuttgart is performing above what’s expected - runners-up in bundesliga is fantastic enough for me. celta and vitesse are struggling - normal in football. strasbourg? sorry :”> limited resources to french ligue 2. overall, i’m tremendously happy for this current football season. keep it up guys. p/s: david beckham please get the hell out of european football asap.. thanks.

today, 30th of april 2007 it’s the birthday of my mother, fatimah selamat. happy birthday, ibu! may allah bless you, living happily ever after. thank you for being a great mother for my 24 years life. i promise that as long as i live, you will always be treated nicely and given best place to live in that i afford. sayang ibu..

last but not list, current song in my head it’s a tough choice to point out from my current song list. i would say that this time i’m back with 80’s / 90’s malay slow rock tune. oh yeah i admit that i listen to malay songs. some are boring but some are nice too. just like english songs. this hit was recorded by ella for soundtrack of a movie which i can’t remember its name, starring my fav actor faizal hussein. tiada tangis lagi by ella..

engkau jadi kenangan
dalam hati
terlalu lama engkau pergi

langit masih begitu
anggun dan biru
memayungi taman rindu

kiambang menjadi lambang
kau bagai bayang-bayang
kini ku terbuang
danau tenang selalu
seolah tidak tahu
gelora di hatiku
selama hayat ini
ku simpan rahsia hati

ku renung masa nan lalu
terasa pilu
ke mana harusku mengadu

[chorus]

di sini ku berdiri
tiada tangis lagi

oh..ohhhh..ohhhhhhhh…

tiada tangis lagi

* have a good day. i’m signing off. wassalam.

assalamualaikum. pe cher? 2 minggu lps aku tgk 2 wayang tempatan. kalau la ada kesempatan dan bajet, rasanya angka tu msti dh b’tmbh. yg pertama the red kebaya dan yg lg satu cinta. secara jujur, industri perfileman kita ada prospek utk maju. cuma kita prlu bg lebih byk sokongan yg pstinya m’berikan suntikan modal kpd penerbit2 buat pusingan melabur. mlm sblm aku g tgk red kebaya tu, t’jmp lak pelakon2 citer tu kt klcc. hari berikutnya lak sgt la stress. chow dr batcave (bkn batu caves aaa..), otak buntu, trs je la merayau, tgk2 org b’atur kt tgv. aku pun sengal g la ikt padahal xtau pun nk tgk pe. tgk2 casino royale – sold out. fuhh.. dahsyat. bkn pe, citer action ni aku kureng nk tgk kt panggung sbb x puas, byk potong. cth.. tgn pegang pisau lipat, tau2 dh mampos. kadang2 smp xtau mati kna tikam ke.. mati t’telan pisau ke.. jd aku carila saluran2 lain nk tgk wayang genre camtu. camne pun sbb utama masih krn aku nk cuba sokong buah tangan dr malaysia. aku bkn main suka nk kondem sna-sni. x hebat pun xpe - memadai ada unsur seni & bkn main sebat xde idea asal bole jual. masterpiece konon ptuihh.. crett (tandoori payat).. ahaha. red kebaya ok gak. sinematografi dan pelakon bole thn. satu yg nmpk lemah ialah storyline. if lbh pnjg skt dgn lbh turun naik itu ini, rsnya akan jd lbh mantap. cth.. lps tau kisah lampau, latiff jmp blk org pakai kebaya merah ke.. keseluruhan, memuaskan dan jauh lbh baik drpd masterpiece2 “dia”. teka2 la sapa “dia” ^.^ x lama pastu lak, aku tgk karya yg mmg dh lama aku tgg. cinta. hebat. sapa kata sama dgn love actually? memandai je.. aku kompang karang br tau. mmg lain tuan2 dan puan2. cinta ada kekuatannya yg t’sndiri. dan bole bersaing dgn unsur2 artistik dlm sepet dan gubra. pertama skali, dato rahim razali sgt hebat dlm cinta. watak yg dibawa dijiwai dgn sgt baik dan b’ksn. tahniah dato! org lamo mmg byk ilmunya bole kata most perkara hebat dlm citer ni; jln citer, pelakon, sinematografi, originality, etc. cuma 1 kelemahan. bbrp pelakon tambahan dlm cinta agak kaku. cth.. doktor yg rawat dan x-bf amani. agak m’cacatkan tp keseluruhannya x m’gugat mutu citer. kesimpulannya, sokong la 2 citer ni. lg satu ialah bilut. tu pun agak best. if x smpt g panggung, bli la produk ori citer2 ni. sokonglah karya tmptn. so di samping kurang utk kayakan tokey2 filem yahudi, kayakanlah juga tokey filem kita. ikhlas. wassalam.

Every time I feel alone
I can blame it on you and I do, oh
You got me like a loaded gun
Golden sun and sky so blue, oh
We both know that we want it
And we both know you left me no choice

Chaque fois que tu t’en vas
You just bring me down
Je prétends que tout va bien
So I’m counting my tears ‘til I get over you

Sometimes I watch the world go by
I wonder what it’s like, oh
To wake up every single day
Smile on your face you never tried (you never tried), oh
We both know we can’t change it
But we both know we’ll just have to face it

Chorus

If only I could give you up
But would I want to let you off from this soapbox, baby?

We both know that we want it
But we both know you left me no choice

Chorus x 2

We both know that I’m not over you
I’m not over you

* Aritu aku tgh dgr Red 104.9 kuar satu lagu yg memukau perhatian aku pd corong radio. Best tp aku tatau lagu apa. Tiba² dlm keta baru² ni abg aku psg cd dan sampai ke satu trek lagu yg sama dimainkan. Inilah lagunya. Kpd pembaca² sekalian jika blm pnah dgr, wajib utk anda cuba lyn. Kpd rockers² lak, jgn jd koyo la.. Hentak² kepala pun ada masa² nk sentimental kan? Tgh main dgn perasaan tu, cubalah bertemankan lagu ni. Selamat..

hi people. where u at gurl? (wth?) i’m here ~ back in my hometown, my kampung, enjoying the harvesting season while it lasts. the scent of fresh mud.. birds floating in the sky while stand still scarecrows keep them away. stupid birds..

today, for almost quite a long time before, i taste a deadly defeat. as i remembered, last time such event occurred was at mmu “stupid” gema 2003. my band was knocked out of its preliminary round. our first song was percayakan siti and still i can’t forget how stunned was the audience after we played that song. suddenly the bastard fcm lecturer whatever his name is, yelled at us to repeat the tune. wonder why? here was the situation.. we supposed to start second..

organizer    : “..the first band will play last. u guys first. we have no time. all   equipments are ready so just go in and start. go go go..“

we              : “errr.. okay..”

second mic was louder than for main vox, bass was amplified by a zero volume mic and the best part.. taraaa.. neither lead, rhythm nor bass guitar was in tune. still i admit, our quality that nite was bad. we crashed out, together with the next band after us. only after the second band, organizer postponed the session for some time, fixing all problems..

it’s not that after the day i have always been a winner. i lost some but all were undisruptive or maybe not focusing on me single-handedly. so repeating my sentence, today’s crush was lethal. people may comment that it was nothing, but for me it was a thing. i failed.. boys and girls, to all whom said before that i am perfect and have always waited eagerly for me to stumble, wait no more. see, just what i told u before. i am mortal ^_^

what else happened recently? owh.. my beloved bianconeri was thrown to serie b. now here is the stage to show how loyal our players are. several moved out. some more screaming infidelities too. get the hell out if so! we don’t need you. even if juventus will spend time at lower level leagues for the rest of my life, i won’t quit. black and white are my main soul of futbol. then only come selangor, man u, stuttgart, celta, strasbourg, vitesse and kickers. remember kickers? kakeru and his fellow teammates. cartoons were so irresistible that era. and suddenly now.. spongebob what? i mean, for little girls it’s fine. but when my 10 years old nephew described spongebob’s storyboard with passion, i can only expressed “alamak”! but anyway, be strong old lady.. even if the whole team vanish, u are always in my heart.. sob sob..

this is a hit from tupac amaru shakur. for me i have no string attached to its lyrics except for the line “but life goes on..”. a gangster proud of his wrongdoings.. huh! still your beat is catchy, g. have a wonderful life dear readers. daa~

How many brothers fell victim to the streets
Rest in peace young nigga, there’s a Heaven for a G
Be a lie, if I told ya that I never thought of death
My nigga, we the last ones left
But life goes on

As I bail through tha empty halls
Breath stinkin’ in my drawls
Ring, ring, ring, quiet y’all, incoming call
Plus this my homie from high school, he gettin by
It’s time to bury another brother, nobody cry
Life as a baller, alcohol and booty calls
We used to do them as adolecents, do you recall?
Raised as G’s, Loc’ed out and blazed the weed
Get on the roof let’s get smoked out and blaze with me
Two in the morning and we still high assed out
Screamin thug till I die before I passed out
But now that your gone, I’m in the zone
Thinkin I don’t wanna die all alone
But now ya gone and all I got left are stinkin’ memories
I love them niggas to death
I’m drinkin Hennessy
While tryin to make it last
I drank a fifth for that ass when you passed….
Cause life goes on

Chorus

Yeah nigga I got the word as hell
Ya blew trial and the judge gave you 25 with an L
Time to prepare to do fed time won’t see parole
Imagine life as a convict that’s getten’ old
Plus with the drama we’re lookin out for your baby’s mama
Taken risks, while keepin cheap tricks from gettin on her
Life in the hood is all good for nobody
Remember gamin on dumb hotties at chill parties
Me and you no true a two
While scheming on hits and gettin tricks
That maybe we can slide into
But now you burried
Rest nigga cause I ain’t worried
Eyes bluried, sayin goodbye at the cemetary
Though memories fade
I got your name tatted on my arm
So we both ball till my dyin days
Before I say goodbye
Kato and Mental rest in peace
Thug till I die

Chorus

Bury me smilin with G’s in my pocket
Have a party at my funeral, let every rapper rock it
Let the hoes that I used to know
From way before
Kiss me from my head to my toe
Give me a paper and pen
So I can write about my life of sin
A couple bottles of gin incase I don’t get in
Tell all my people I’m a Ridah
Nobody cries when we die
We outlaws let me ride
Until I get free
I live my life in the fast lane got police chasin me
To my niggas from old blocks from old crews
Niggas that guided me through back in the old school
Pour out some liquor have a toast for the homies
See we both gotta die but you chose to go before me
And brothers miss you while your gone
You left your nigga on his own, how long we mourn
Life goes on

Sung over Chorus

Life goes on homie
Gone on, cause they passed away
Niggas doin life
Niggas doin 50 and 60 years and shit
I feel ya nigga, trust me, I feel ya
You know what I mean
Last year
We poured out liquor for you
This year nigga, life goes on
We’re gonna clock now
Get money, evade bitches, evade tricks
Give players plenty space
And basicaly just represent for you baby
Next time you see your niggas
Your gonna be on top nigga
They gonna be like
Goddamn, them niggas came up
That’s right baby
Life goes on
And we up out this bitch
Hey Kato, Mental
Y’all niggas make sure it’s poppin when we get up there
Don’t front